Stepping Away
by BSManthaLUV
Summary: Manny's dead, and Emma's left keeping the pieces of her left behind alive. Emma take's everything Manny did to an extreme. Who will be there to pull her back? Jemma. Hiatus.
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I don't own Degrassi. Just this plot and the imagination that came up with it; no matter what my mother says.

**Authors Note:** This will be relatively short. A few chapters maybe, and I'm not sure how frequent the updates will be (I'm putting 70 of my concentration on another story). But I just felt like writing this. It may be a little OOC, let me know what you think.

**Summary:** Manny's dead. Now Emma has to keep alive the pieces of her that were left alive. She's loosing it, taking everything Manny did to the extreme. Who will be there to pull her back? Jemma.

**Filler: **I don't know how old the people in Degrassi are, but now they're seniors or something. Jay wasn't part of the shooting. But Sean is gone! Ha, I made a rhyme betcha can't do that!

_Stepping Away_

Manny fell so hard. Shattered her life and left Emma to keep her soul alive. Emma knew it, she knew it every second she kissed a guy, every time she put on a shirt with a dangerously low neckline, Manny hadn't wanted to die. So Emma sacrificed her own self and hijacked Manny's personality.

Everytime she doubted herself she just thought about what had happened. Who had died, why'd they died. And instantly she took a step forward, pushed herself harder.

Emma knew the teachers worried and her parents worried. The shooting and now this? They constantly questioned how she was doing, thinking that how she dressed and the slight shift in personality was a small price.

But they were wrong. Because they didn't know the reasons behind her sudden change, didn't know why one day she just stopped crying and bought a thong. They didn't know how happy Emma was when she'd gotten Manny's clothes.

But they didn't try to find out either, just went on with their own lives. Manny was the only one who cared about Emma, now Emma had to repay her. Even if she wasn't there to see it happen.

"So wanna go out Friday night?" Emma leaned forward on the desk in a flirtatious manner. A year later after Manny's death it was safe to go after him, and to go through with it.

Craig looked up from his worksheet and arched an eyebrow, but smiled slightly. "Where?"

"Anywhere." Ashley was eyeing Emma from across the room, and Emma enjoyed her icy glance. Knowing she was getting to her by getting to her ex made something jump inside her. Manny liked jealously, she liked to know she was a threat. And Emma liked to know she was being like Manny.

"Well, my bands playing tonite, but you can watch. Then we can go out after." He smiled wider, giving her a flirtatious grin.

"Perfect."

* * *

Ashley watched that vulture move in on Craig, and began to hate Emma a little more. No matter what happened between them, Ashley would never think of Craig as some trashy blonde's toy.

Emma was the trashy blonde, and she seemed to strongly believe that Craig was her toy. You fooled around with it for a while, than sold it to someone else at a garage sale.

But a part of Ashley hated herself for hating Emma. After what had happened she deserved the right to be torn up inside, but to take out her hurt on every decent looking guy in Degrassi was over the top.

Ashley watched Emma as she walked away satisfied, her see through shirt revealing a decked out bra.

Something had changed in Emma, but Ashley didn't care what it was. She just wanted the old Emma to peek out of the shadows and say she was okay.

* * *

She'd recently taken up dancing. It was a way to free the old Emma, without ruining the Manny threatening to take over.

Emma danced everytime chance she got, she loved to go out into the woods on rainy, dark nights with a walkman and dance uncontrollably. It was easy to do, and you didn't really have to be good at it to do it.

And here she was now standing in the pouring rain with mascara running down her cheeks shaking her hips slightly as she leaned on the tree for support, to stop her thoughts from weighing her down.

_Best of You_ threatened to break her eardrums. But she didn't care; the drums provided a good rhythm to sway mindlessly to.

Dancing was her way to abandon the world, before she abandoned herself.

* * *

Craig had been utterly silent the whole night. Not even bothering to kiss her good night, she hadn't gotten what she wanted that night and she'd used her best material. Mostly focusing her around her clingy shorts.

The only words he said all night were the lyrics he sang and he spoke to Emma only in one-word reply to what she'd said.

But Emma wasn't finished, she tried to be stubborn and push herself like Manny would have. But it was hard; especially when what she wanted to do was destroy Craig's ego, but it would be Manny's way of getting back at him.

New words swam through Emma's mind, "I miss you." And she was lulled to sleep by thinking those words, in a silent lullaby.

* * *

"I hear you've taken on a new image." Jay said as Emma approached her locker, she wouldn't get access to it though. Not until Jay moved out of his position, he had leaned on her locker expertly denying her entrance.

Emma sighed. "Maybe." She wouldn't give him straight answers; she wouldn't give him anything beyond one-word answers. Even when she wanted to give him a string of four letter words.

"Hooked up with every guy in school. Didn't even exclude me." He had that whole bad-boy thing going on, taking the wittiness out of comments. Making them serious and hard.

"Move." It was as close to a real four-letter word she could get. She hated him, with a passion.

"Do you have a sign up sheet?" He frowned dangerously. Annoyed obviously.

"What do you want?"

"I wanna know what the hell the environments going to do without you." He arched an eyebrow, and looked anxious to leave. Yet, he was here.

"The environment will do fine thanks." But still he stayed. Not swayed by her answer. "Please. Leave." She whispered pleading. In a way, she was afraid of him and that gave the Emma she used to know a chance of escape.

He leaned forward, cold and hard. Staring at her with his eyes narrowed, "Last time I checked you were nature's biggest fan."

"Last time I checked I hated you." She hissed trying to get him to back off.

"Last time I checked you weren't Manny that many girl."

He strolled away after that, leaving Emma gawking. But she pulled herself together fast, because no matter what anyone said Manny would live on, somehow. Even if Emma had to ensure it herself.

**A/N:** This is a lot darker than my other fics. Wow, I'm scaring myself. It's almost creepy. Anyway, push the review button please, I want to know if your reading this. And tell me what you think, I don't mind constructive criticism. Oh, but say a little more than "Update". That ticks me off, I'd rather have no reviews than twelve of those.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer: **I don't own Degrassi.

Emma slipped on her shoes just as her alarm clock let out a screech; she immediately shut it off craving the silence and warmth of her blanket.

But she couldn't do that, she couldn't waste her time sitting around wishing she could go back to sleep. And after seeing what happened to Manny time was just so precious to Emma that she'd go to any length to make sure it was always full of everything.

She slipped off the edge of her bed and took a look in her mirror, barely seeing her reflection in her dark room. It looked over-shadowed, like someone was stealing her spotlight. But she matched the darkness, in her black stilettos and black leather jacket. She had added a splash of blue with her fishnets, and a dab of white with her cut-off tank top.

She hoped he'd feel bad about himself, feel bad he couldn't nail her and couldn't even come in physical contact with her. It's what Manny would have done, and Emma needed to press rewind and play to bring Manny back to life. Even if she was only stopping her own life and no ones around her.

Like a CD player, she was on repeat playing the same song over and over. Unable to stop or press fast forward, stuck in the past.

But this very second Emma was for once depending on herself and fixing her own life. Though she was using Manny's personality to accomplish that goal.

But setting her own life back on track would be worth it once she saw it all in his face.

Emma would see it all in his face.

Emma knew he'd be there, with a couple girls hanging off of him. Probably sitting next to the fire faking a laugh. He'd always thought he had so many secrets, but he didn't. To Emma he was an open book, because she could relate to him. They were the same in different ways. She knew what it meant when he was making out with a girl and why he sat alone at lunch sometimes.

Emma pushed her way through the rotting bush, planning to make a surprise entry. The party was filled with booze, something Manny hated but Emma loved. She knew people called her depressed and creepy. But no one picked up on the fact that she was trying to become Manny 2.0.

Approaching the eye of the storm, the fire Emma started trying to find Jay. She first checked to see if the van was still there, but surprisingly it wasn't. The spot that it was in just had a couple people sitting in a circle playing a game of spin the bottle. Most likely, it was more advanced than the middle-school game.

Among those people was Jay. The fire that sat a fair distance away cast an eerie glow on him, making him appear to shimmer in the night sky, light dancing in barely noticeable wisps across his face. There were at least five girls sitting around him and one other guy. Other people layed scattered amongst the lawn talking and flirting and making out.

Suddenly, Emma felt like she did the first time she was here. She had that sudden natural high that came out of nowhere. But that feeling of insecurity quickly followed it. And for a second Manny faltered and Emma returned.

But just as quickly she'd snaked back away into the shadows.

Casey spun the bottle, which was Jay's cue to get up and go somewhere else. He wasn't going to take the chance of the bottle stopping on him when Casey - another guy - was spinning it.

It would inevitably lead down a road he didn't even want to dream about.

He shoved his hands in his jean pockets off in search of another hot girl to flirt with. He wanted to see someone new, someone different. He had no intentions of making out with the same old little girl, it got boring, became a drag.

That's when he saw her, standing behind the tree quietly observing her surroundings. No doubt bringing back the memories that he and she both wanted to forget.

Jay didn't want her here; she didn't belong. She shouldn't be standing there watching with interest, she should be running away in disgust and fear. He approached her cautiously; the little girl he knew had changed so much. In reality, she _was_ a little girl afraid of the world and herself, not the cool manipulating skank she'd turned into.

"What the hell are you doing here," He slipped his arm around her waist out of flirty habit, guiding her away from the party and closer to the quiet dirt road.

"Partying. Having fun." Emma was clearly flirting. In her skimpy shirt and the pants that just barely passed her bikini line. Unlike she would of in the past, she didn't remove his arm from her waist.

"Why'd you turn into such a slut? What do you have a split personality?" He unwound his arm from her waist.

"Yeah," Came her surprising answer, "And you love me for it." She was flirting, trying to lure him in. But she was naive; he wouldn't fall for this type of fake.

"I don't remember saying that."

"Amnesia?"

"No."

"Just remember that you picked me." He regretted what she was referring to. He wanted to take it back, and remember the softness of his hand and what pain he inflicted upon whom it belonged to.

She had to draw him in, he was resistant. Emma put her hand on his cheek, but then drew it back slowly. Then she walked away…

He looked like he wanted her to come back, but she wouldn't. Since she'd succeeded in what she'd had to do.

"Hey Manny." Emma whispered to the gravestone. She let her fingers slip across the engraved surface slowly.

It had a little blurb on it, Manny's last words. 'It's always worth the risk.' But had it been worth it? Taking two lives with her instead of one.

"Jay's a jerk. You tried to tell me, sorry I didn't listen." She whispered. Emma pressed the button on the boom box sending 'My Happy Ending' blaring through the cemetery. Then she danced…

**A/N:** Like it? I think I do. This was sort of a filler chapter. Review please!


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